“I think I’m ready for the second act. I think I’m ready for the story to change. Don’t know what I believe anymore, maybe that’s okay.”
– Missy Higgins from the song ‘The Second Act’
There’s something about Missy Higgins’ music that feels like home to me. Every album she lovingly pours herself into carries the weight of raw emotion, vulnerability, and truth. Her lyrics have always had a way of speaking to my heart, capturing moments of change, heartache, and the messy beauty of being human.
One of those lyrics in particular, the one you see above, captures the essence of what so many of us feel when we find ourselves questioning the beliefs that once anchored us. It’s that moment of realising we’re ready for something different, something new—a “second act,” if you will. And yet, the certainty we once held onto is gone, replaced with a profound sense of “I don’t know anymore.” But here’s the thing: maybe not knowing is okay. Maybe, it’s even necessary.
The Unravelling Of Faith
Deconstructing faith isn’t a neat, linear process. It’s messy, painful, and, more often than not, disorienting. It’s like standing in the middle of a burning building, watching the walls of everything you once knew and trusted crumble around you. For me, this process wasn’t just intellectual—it was deeply personal. It felt like losing a part of myself, of who I had been for so long. And in some ways, that’s exactly what was happening.
Faith, for many of us, isn’t just a set of beliefs. It’s a way of life. It shapes our worldview, our sense of purpose, our relationships, and our very identity. So when that begins to unravel, when we begin to question the very things that once felt so sure, it can feel like the ground beneath our feet is crumbling. I remember the nights lying awake, wondering, “Who am I without this? What if everything I believed was wrong?”
And yet, somewhere in the midst of that fear and uncertainty, there was a quiet, persistent voice whispering, “Maybe that’s okay.” Maybe it’s okay not to have all the answers. Maybe it’s okay to question, to doubt, to wonder if there’s another way forward. And maybe, just maybe, this is the beginning of something new.
The Power Of The Second Act
Faith deconstruction isn’t about tearing everything down just for the sake of it. It’s about transformation. It’s about letting go of beliefs that no longer resonate, that no longer serve who we are becoming, and making room for something deeper, truer. About creating space for curiosity, for questioning, and for a spirituality that feels authentic to who we are today—not who we were told to be.
For me, embracing the “second act” has meant learning to live with the tension of uncertainty. It’s meant acknowledging that I may never have all the answers, and that’s okay. It’s also meant reclaiming my story, on my own terms. For so long, I lived within the confines of a narrative that was written for me, by the church, by religious leaders, by societal expectations.
But now, in this second act, I’m writing my own script.
The beauty of this process is that it’s not about erasing the past. It’s about recognising that the story is changing, evolving. The beliefs that once defined me don’t have to be thrown away, but they also don’t have to be the final word.
I’m allowed to grow, to change, to seek a new understanding of faith, one that is expansive and filled with grace for myself and others.
The Freedom Of Not Knowing
One of the most liberating aspects of faith deconstruction is the freedom to say, “I don’t know.”
It’s such a simple phrase, but it’s one that holds so much power, especially in a world that often values certainty above all else. For so long, I felt the pressure to have all the answers, to defend my beliefs, to know exactly what I stood for. But now? I’m okay with the fact that I don’t know and I think that’s where the magic happens.
In that space of not knowing, there’s room for exploration. There’s room to ask the hard questions, to wrestle with doubt, and to explore new ways of thinking about spirituality, meaning, and life. It’s in that space where we begin to find the truest version of ourselves—the version that’s not bound by the expectations of others or the rigidity of a belief system that no longer serves us.
My Personal Journey
Faith deconstruction is something I’ve walked through personally. For years, I immersed myself in a faith that shaped every part of my identity. And when that faith no longer aligned with who I was becoming, it felt like losing everything at once.
There were moments of deep grief, moments when I wondered if I would ever find solid ground again. But there were also moments of profound liberation—moments when I realised that letting go of certainty didn’t mean losing myself. It meant finding myself in a deeper, more authentic way.
You are allowed to be in the middle of the story, unsure of where it’s headed. After all, the second act is where the character’s growth happens. It’s where transformation takes place. And in many ways, it’s where the real story begins.
Are You Ready For Your Second Act?
If you’re in a space of faith deconstruction, if you’re standing at the precipice of not knowing, I want to remind you that it’s okay. It’s okay to let go of what no longer fits. It’s okay to feel lost and uncertain. And it’s okay to write a new story for yourself. One that feels true to who you are now, not who you were told to be.
Faith deconstruction isn’t an end—it’s a beginning. It’s the second act, where you get to reclaim your story, your beliefs, and your sense of self. So, ask yourself: are you ready for your second act?
What might it look like to let go of the old narrative and embrace the unknown with curiosity and grace? Maybe, just maybe, that’s where your journey truly begins.
Reach out if your would like to explore this in a safe, accepting and confidential space – just for you.
If you want to listen to Missy Higgins new album, I highly recommend! Here it is on Spotify.